Here's to Happy Women...

Why is it that we have some friends who make us feel good about ourselves, and then we have other friends who always tend to bring us down? And just like a marriage, for better or for worse, we hang in there with the downers for as long as possible. Faithful until the end. These days, many friendships outlast marriages. This makes me wonder...do I make my friends feel good about themselves? Or am I a downer friend? After all, I’m opinionated, pragmatic, and if you ask me a question, I generally tell the truth…as I believe it to be. On the plus side, this means that I will always tell my friends when their mascara is smeared or if they have a poppy seed or a piece of spinach in their teeth. But honesty is not always popular, and sometimes difficult to maintain— especially when a friend is going through a rough time. When friends have a problem, they generally want you to tell them only what they want to hear—and that’s usually what you do, because you don’t want to cause them mor...

Okay…my husband is on a di et. His knee surgery last year caused problems. He’s not as active as he was prior to the surgery—not by a long shot. He can’t walk for extended periods, nor can he ride the step machine or the stationary bike at the gym as he once did. He can’t even play golf. Bottom line: he’s gained weight because he can’t do what he normally does to stay fit—almost. We’ll get to the “almost” in a bit. A new knee is supposedly the answer to this dilemma. Alas, this begets another dilemma. To get the new knee my husband has to lose weight—or else the operation won’t be successful. Exercise is obviously out of the question, so here we are—counting carbs, calories, fat content and constantly reading labels for taboo ingredients like high fructose corn syrup, trans fat and refined flour. We’ve never done this before. It’s almost like learning a foreign language, except foreign languages aren’t as sneaky as the food labels. This entire situation sounds miserable ...

We've all heard of a win-win situation, but w hat about a lose-win situation? Sounds confusing, but it’s not. Sometimes when we lose we still win. Take for example a recent event in my life. Some of my readers nominated me for both “Best Writing” and “Most Thought Provoking” in an online competition for women bloggers. I told everyone who would listen—and a few who wouldn’t—that I wanted either one of these awards for the first line of my book proposal. I explained over and over again that it would be a call out to influential people, especially editors. It would make them stand up and take notice and provide validation that I was doing something right—that there’s an audience out there for my sideways voice. How pompous, silly and narcissistic I must have sounded...and stupid. I failed to realize that receiving the nominations and then making it into the semi-finals meant that I was being noticed already—and that my readers were plenty influential in their own right. More im...

I’m not a man e xpert, but I am somewhat of a shoe expert—and I’m convinced that t here are three types of guys in the world. That’s right; I’ve narrowed it down to just three. There’s the “shoetree” kind of guy; there’s the guy who knows what a shoetree is, but will never use one; and finally, there’s the guy who says, “Shoe tree? Since when do shoes grow on trees?” As I stood looking at the display of cedar shoetrees in the Nordstrom men’s department recently, these were the thoughts running through my mind. Not sure if I would call it an epiphany. It was more like my own brand of sideways clarity. When I was single, I dated each of these types. So it was that I to ok an interesting journey down memory lane...with a lot of old shoes walking along beside me. You can probably guess which type of guy I married, since there I was looking at men’s shoetrees. So perhaps my opinion is biased, but hey…it’s my her-story and I’m sticking to it. Currently, I have two shoetree guys in my lif...

Why is it that perfectly happy couples easily fall prey to the most lethal "Hallmark" holiday of all — Saint Valentine's Day? It's like quicksand. Once you fall into the pit, you can't get out. Fights, arguments and hurt feelings, which can all lead to the playing of the hazardous "no sex" card, are more commonplace than you may think on the supposedly most romantic day of the year. Once this card is played, it's easier to use it again — and again. Once sex is held hostage, it's all downhill from there. Just ask your mother. Trust me on this... she'll know. Now you may think that single people have dibs on the heartache and hurt that Valentine's Day can cause. They don't, but they do have a good case. After all, if you're not one half of a couple then it's right there on your calendar reminding you of just how "not a couple" you are. New Year's Eve is another event tha t alienates singles and promotes force...

I have several guy friends and a few of these boys are great big flirts. They flirt with everyone. The waitress, the teller, the receptionist…even their mother. That’s just the way they are. Are they looking for a sexual escapade? No…well at least not with their mother. Are they acting inappropriately? At work, there’s a good chance they are, given the new rules and regulations. Everywhere else, I believe they’re just being friendly...and having some fun. This brings me to my point, and rather quickly I might add. Flirting is fun. It makes us feel happy and boosts our self-confidence level. The fli rting I’m talking about is the harmless kind, not the lecherous type. It involves wordplay and innuendo…nice, friendly smiles…and the occasional wink. Wow. When I put it that way, I could be describing several of my married friends — guys and gals. And why not? Why should the single folks have all the fun? What’s wrong with a little “word” play among friends…as long as it’s only words?...

Share the love chicas and chicos... Note to self: Go to the "Share the Love" Blog Awards, now through February 6, and vote for some of our ladies of the roundtable, including Bonnie of "Ballpoint Wren" for Best Site Design, Lisa of "A Comforter is Not a Bedspread" for Happiest and Most Inspiring, Matty of "Running on Empty" for Most Thought Provoking, Kacey of "Cookie's Oven" for "Blog I'll Never Stop Reading" and Teri of "Here's to Happy Women" for Best Writing (and Most Thought Provoking). First round semi-finalist voting ends on 2/6. Share the Love Blog Awards (Vote Here)