Born to whine...

I’ve come to the realization that some people are born complainers. Not born to be wild, but born to whine. They complain and whine about everything. If they have to work an extra few hours, they complain. If they have to work on a weekend occasionally, they complain. If they don’t have enough work to keep busy, they complain. If it’s not sunny enough outside, they complain. If it’s gloriously sunny, it’s “too” sunny. If it hasn’t rained in a while, they complain. If it rains a lot after a long dry spell, then it’s raining “too” much. Everything is an inconvenience—or injustice—that they take to heart, as if meant specifically for them. What amazes me about complainers is they complain about things beyond their control—or anyone’s control for that matter. The things they complain about which are in their control, they do little about—except, of course, complain.

These are the folks that are lucky enough to go on a nice vacation and then come back and tell you all the bad things that happened while they were away. Somehow, they forget about the amazing waterfall they saw or the nice people they met. Nope, all you hear about is the late plane and the head cold they contracted on the plane ride home.

There’s only one thing worse than a chronic complainer—and it’s a couple of chronic complainers who’ve decided to pair up. When one whiner pairs up with a non-whiner, it’s almost tolerable. But when two whiners join forces, they’re relentless. You get it from all sides. Meet the Whiners. Not only do they complain about life in general, they complain about each other…and to each other. I think that when they complain to each other it’s like over fanning the flame of a bonfire. The fire gets bigger, more ferocious and potential dangerous as the flames get more airtime. Since I’ve been singed by one of these bonfires gone wild in the past, I’ve decided not to give the complainers any more airtime.

At first, I tried to tune the constant complaining out, but then I realized that my “silent” approach tended to lead the Whiners on. They took my non-response as support and they just continued to gripe, and complain, and whine. A friend gave me an idea. She suggested that if I couldn’t tune them out, then I should turn them off. It was actually much easier than I thought. All I had to do was start complaining to them about any thing that I could think of. It worked like a charm. If there is one thing Whiners don’t want to hear, it’s whining, unless, of course, it comes from their mouths.

So what did I complain about to the Whiners? I complained that society as a whole has become too negative, self-absorbed and me-oriented. I complained that people who have so much to be thankful for only want more to be thankful for and don’t appreciate what they have—or their good fortune. Once I even complained that it was a glorious spring day and that I wasn’t in the mood for a glorious spring day. Yes, I made myself into a satire—an ironic caricature of the Whiners—and tried to make an intelligent, if subtle, point. Whether or not I was successful doesn’t matter. What’s more important is that I spun a positive weave around myself—a heavy-duty, impenetrable force field to repel complaining, griping, whining, kvetching and bitching. It’s amazing how good you feel about yourself and your life without the negativity. It’s amazing how energizing it is to be positive without the baggage of others weighing you down. And it’s amazing to enjoy a day of rainfall or sunshine for what each is…a force of nature. And it’s nice to get through a few hours of extra work in the evenings, or on the weekends productively, without dwelling on the “injustice of it all.”

My main point is that no one wants to spend time with a chronic complainer, much less a couple of chronic complainers. Not even if they serve a little cheese with their “whine.” It’s not worth it. It’s not healthy.

In closing, I leave you with my new golden rule. “Serve no 'whine' before its time—and keep in mind that it may never be time.” Well, perhaps I borrowed a bit from Ernest and Julio Gallo, but you get my drift. The next time you start to complain, stop and think—“does this really warrant a complaint?”

Cheers everyone—and I do mean cheers! Have a wonderfully positive and complaint-free week.

Postscript: Does anyone find it ironic that I write an article complaining about complainers? ;)

© 2007 Teresa G. Franta